Archive for April, 2012

by admin
on Apr 7th, 2012

A NEW LEASE ON LIFE

Been sometime since I contributed more of my life to this blogg, but I suppose that this is due to life itself being so full of activity and the need to help others, my grandchildren and my adult children, not to mention my girlfriend Emmerson who dutifully abides by me and enriches my life so much by ensuring I do not need to worry about money because she can spend it all without help from me.

I cannot help but to dwell more and more in my past. I constantly escape my present life despite its comforts and no money worries, to dream once more of Pat Wightman and those idilic summer days in Saltwell Park, those stolen kisses from this beautiful ginger-headed lass that now has me spellbound in recalling my wonderful youth with those wonderful people who shared it with me.I feel now the real love I had, and still have for Pat Wightman, but like all young people, we never realise it until its far too late. Everything we wanted was everything we had, but never recognised it. Ah the folly of youth.
I was never lucky in life though. Some people are born lucky - but not me. I could never win anything. I once felt very depressed so I phoned the Samaritans - they hung up on me.

I recall how my choice of females were never good enough for my mother. I remember taking home this girl from Lobbly Hill who spoke geordie, smoked and spat, and ate her meals with her fingers, which was difficult when it came to the soup. We had tea at my house which consisted of dripping and bread, one cup of tea and a fish-cake made fresh from the goldfish bowl. When my girfriend went home I asked my mother what she thought of her.

My mother said, ” Common as muck, what a tramp, no manners and ugly to boot, don’t bring her here again”! The following week I brought another girl home. She was well educated, she could write and speak in a very posh tone, she had grace, wit and manners. She was born and raised in Low Fell. After tea I asked my mother what she thought of this girl. She replied, ” Toffy-nosed trollope, looking down her nose at my chips and beans, don’t bring her here again”!

Angry at my mother I went to the Mayfair dance hall and picked up a girl who looked like my mother, walked like my mother, talked like my mother and dressed like my mother - now my father hates her - I cannot win.

I am now a young 65 year old with two pensions coming in. My house is paid for and I have no debt. I own my vehicle. So why am I saddened by how I conducted my life? Why do I feel I mistreat people in my youth? Why are my thoughts habitually returning to Pat Wightman and Saltwell Park instead of how best to enjoy my remaining years?

I am fit and healthy. I have lost wight and feel great about it, full of energy and desire, but I constantly return to my past and this illusional girl called Pat.

If I had a wish in life it would be to see my grandchildren, my son Danny’s kids, but they live in London so this makes it difficult. I take great pride that my son Danny and his beautiful wife Charley are both very intelligent people, totally reliable and trustworthy and more than capable of raising my two grandchildren in a manner that will encourage their creativity and produce two upstanding citizens of the future. I have no worries about how these two will reach adulthood, I know they will be well looked after and proudly nutured into good people - but I do miss the contact with them.

I received contact from a boyhood friend a few months ago, from my life in Springwell Estate. I recall him well and was extremely pleased to hear from him, he filled in many gaps in my memory. It is alway good to hear how passed friends have made out in life. His name - Andrew Kinniburgh. I wish you well Andrew.